Saturday, April 30, 2005

Left A Slide

Fender acoustic with the electric neck
Seventies tele that's too heavy
Rickenbacker copy twelve string
Cream coloured thinline with black pick guard
Yellow Japanese Lap Steel, 2001
Full bodied Epiphone acoustic
Aqua and deep red Mustang reissue

Friday, April 29, 2005

Depression Part 1

What is depression?
And how do you find it?

Is it fear?

Is it crossing the street to avoid people for no reason?
Is it worrying what people may say will upset you?
Is it wondering if you're doing the wrong thing?
Is it looking back and not being proud?
Is it a close heart and a dishonest mouth?
Is it relief when you get away without giving away?

Is it hate?

Is it wanting to smash a stranger on a steet?
Is it wanting to scream and shout at people in your way?
Is it wanting to crash cars into buildings?
Is it wanting to turn people against others?
Is it wanting the world to spin into the sun?
Is it wanting scorch Earth as you go?

Is it loneliness?

Is it constantlly refreshing your emails?
Is it keeping your phone nearby and in reach?
Is it staying out when you know you shouldn't?
Is it avoiding going home when you should?
Is it spending money to keep from being bored?
Is it a blank page without colour?

What is depression?
And how do you lose it?

Thursday, April 28, 2005


A friend of mine wrote a poem
About his early twenties
And the line that always gets me is
"When I look back on this time
I see myself as being completely out of control"

I feel like it's slipping out of my fingers too
But it's not late nights and undiscipline
It's waking up and going to work
It's structure with no time
It's an early adulthood wasted in later adulthood

Could I start again?
With all my possesions
Last count - thousands of CDs
Guitars, pianos and books.
I couldn't live without my books.
And there's vinyl
And clothes.

I could lose some but how can I
Throw out that John Reed Club one that Andy gave me
Or that funny one with the Shakespeare quote
"speak low when you speak of love"
That I bought at the Opera House
That I wore when I asked her out in High School
And she said yes

And jackets, the half dozen of them
That people recognise as me more than my face
And the TV, you'll never find another one
That good for that cheap.
Those DVDs I've got from the states.
Couldn't buy those again
And friends and family.

If it was for something then yes.
For a job, or for a girl.
Or maybe just go
Like that picture of Billy Bragg
at a train station somewhere
With a backpack, guitar
And sitting on a little amp
Because it's Billy Bragg after all

Maybe I've dug myself in and I didn't notice
My world shrunk but I shrunk with it
I've got all my homewares and entertainment
A steady income, a series of actvities
All the mod cons and signs of consumption
I'm young, successful, living well
And I see myself as being completely out of control

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

They put mirrors up
to create the illusion of space
They cover plastic toys
With wooden patterned paint

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

"I've got my own double cross to bear"
-Tom Waits

Monday, April 25, 2005

Life and death of...

How do Comedians stand the same jokes every night?
My favourite ones all wanted to die

Sunday, April 24, 2005


I might not be drunk
But I'm going to be fucking your girlfriend later
Now that's magic

Saturday, April 23, 2005

Saturday 23/05/2005

If I didn't have a name
Everything would stay the same
Except I would never have to talk to anybody again

Wouldn't life be sweet
If the people on the streets
Will never ever become a person you'll meet

Friday, April 22, 2005

Lonely Boys

Tim Oxley via Lucinda Williams...

Lonely boys, lonely boys

Frozen dinners are thawed out by lonely boys
Dirty clothes are worn by lonely boys

Lonely boys, lonely boys
Self destruction and lonely boys
paranoia follows lonely boys

Lonely boys, lonely boys
Sweet sad songs sung by lonely boys
I ought to know about lonely boys

Thursday, April 21, 2005

I lost you but...

I lost you
But I found country music
I found country music to hold me and sooth me
The way you used to do

I miss you
but luckily there's music
Luckily there's music
to get me through

I think of you
Every day of my life
And every day I miss you and wonder and guess
What you are listening to

And every day I miss you and wonder and guess
What you are listening to

What you are listening to

Pantene Hair Girl part 1

Dear Pantene Hair Girl

you have no idea how seeing your face lights up my day
you do strange things that show me we'll never be together
like how your choice of snack is apples and Vita Brits
Whereas I'm down to one meal a day
And usually it's microwaved for one

I hope that doesn't come across wrong
but a pretty face does is light
and it might be mean for me to ask for no more
but I'm not done with my lonely life yet
and it would never work

but it's like those songs
that say the same thing only better
how you're so beautiful that it must've been the work
of something better
than me

So I'll keep seeing you
and try to not melt at the knees
as I exchange a casual hello
and hold myself back
from showering you with presents
that implies I promise I wont keep

I'm sorry, but you make me happy
or at least happier
and I'm using you
because you're beautiful

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Phoned in Sick

Wasted a day
Wasting away

Tuesday, April 19, 2005


I remember as a kid when I used to get sick
I got this weird feeling of intertia
Like strong winds closing door after door
Slamming and clanging down

This feeling returned last night, 4am.
I tried to slow my breathing but the rush came
And it's the scariest feeling, because I feel so helpless
In the end I had to get up and read.

Monday, April 18, 2005

First Post

Back in your town
I press a thumb against a rib
To try and wake the muscles up

My body has yet to unfold
And neither has the week
And neither has the year